Things You Could Use My Left Arm For

Last week I made a list of a few things I'd give my left arm for.  There were no takers on my offer, so I thought I've add some incentive by listing a few things you could use my left arm for:

Writing guest posts for your blog*

A gift for the next busy person who tells you, "I've only got two hands!"

A doorstop

A 'conversation starter' for your coffee table

Spanking device for your unruly children ('don't make me get THE HAAAAND!')

Magic tricks

Employee motivation ('Good job! Give yourselves a pat on the back. Okay, now pass it around the table.')

Measuring cubits

*Batteries not included

If you're not going to take me up on the offer, the least you could do is come up with a few other creative uses for my left arm in case someone else wants it.

Have at it!



Sgt. Wolverine said...

It could be an excellent tool for bidding at auctions.

Ricky Anderson said...


I was hoping you'd chime in on this one; I knew it'd be good.

Sgt. Wolverine said...

I'm actually sort of disappointed in my contribution. I'll do better next time!