Today's guest post is from Tyler Stanton. He's hilarious, and he writes about dentists a bit too frequently.
After looking around Ricky’s blog for a bit, I knew this was the perfect opportunity to air some of my computer-related grievances. Here are a few things that drive me insane:
If I see you double-click a link, I already know everything there is to know about you. You have an @aol.com email address. You shut down your computer after every use. Your internet start page is msn.com. You have four different free-trial anti-virus programs running simultaneously on your computer. Oh, and your t-shirt is currently tucked into your beltless jeans.
Typing in the "http://" or “www.”
This is my fingernails-on-a-chalkboard. In the time it’s taking you to find those unnecessary backslashes, I could have visited the site, restarted my computer, made a sandwich, eaten the sandwich, and upgraded my computer’s firmware.*
Acting overly ignorant
So you’re not a user. That’s fine. But when one out of every five people in the world with computer access is a member, a movie about it’s origin is nominated for the best film of the year, and it’s founder has just been named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year, there is absolutely no excuse for you to still call it “FaceSpace”.
Not Googling something first
Google knows every answer to every question ever conceived. Google is never busy. And Google is never going to judge you for asking a stupid question. Search first, ask last.
Touching my screen
I’ve written about this guy before. You know, the guy who really wants to show you something on the computer. Instead of simply pointing to the link he wants you to click, he stabs your screen with his index finger with a force that could pierce elephant skin. It’s not really the smudges that get me – it’s the permanent rainbow-colored bruise on the center of my screen that will last until the end of time.
I’m sure you have a bunch of your own. What would you add to the list?