Stuff Popping Around In My Head, Part IV (Ivy) (Not Poison)

So apparently you're supposed to wash your coffee mug every day. One of my coworkers had an intervention with me the other day. Turns out the phrase 'that time of month' refers to something else...

Another one of my coworkers went out of town for a month and left his plant with me. I agreed to water it every day. It's been a week and a half now. The funeral service is tomorrow. This is the third office plant I've killed. Don't worry; my coworker's not dumb - he's new.

I ordered deodorant on Amazon two weeks ago. It got here today. Maybe Jana will let me come home now.

If you want to know where something is located in Babies Backwards R Us, let me know. It's become my home away from home. We spent 4 hours there last Saturday. Guess what we bought? That's right; a pacifier. That's it.

What color socks aren't you wearing?



Jared A Clifton said...

Stay strong in your "don't wash a coffee mug forever and never" ideals! I do the same thing! Just tell people you're going green, or some crap like that. Then, when they're all "it's unsanitary" you can be like "excUUUUse me for loving this planet more than you!" That'll show 'em.

Some Guy said...

Or just get a brown coffee mug in the first place. They'll never know if it's clean or dirty.

And how'd you know I'm not wearing socks?