There are many differences between men and women, such as shopping.
A man will not 'shop'. It is dull, pointless, and the root of all evil. The more time spent in stores is just that: more time spent. Time is money, which manages to get spent, too. A woman, however, finds this nefarious activity absolutely spellbinding. To them, it's great: Go spend someone else's money on clothes you will wear only in the dressing room. This is the only chance they will have to wear them, because the $100 'must-have' outfit will be out of style by the time she gets home. She will (again) have 'nothing to wear'.
This logic boggles a man's mind. He can wear sixth generation jeans with fourteen holes in each leg for a month before it bothers him. He does not care how he looks. He has no idea what the inside of a dressing room looks like. He spends no time there, yet he is perfectly satisfied with his clothes. They smell halfway decent and fit fine.
A woman is horrified by this type of lifestyle. All items owned by her must be new and have several duplicates waiting just in case. This is why some females walk around with a purse and a backpack. One is for storage, and the other is for...more storage. This abundance of storage is needed to contain all the items captured during her latest 'shopping adventure' (oxymoron alert!).
Men have shorter attention spans than women. If an item doesn't immediately grab their attention, it deservedly loses it. Shopping serves no practical purpose for men. We need fast-paced action, such as football.
Rather than go shopping, a man prefers to 'gift retrieve'. This bright idea may come as a shock to all the shopping addicts. Here's how it works:
After an intense football game in the park with his buddies, a man might think to himself, "Hmmm. I stink worse than my great Aunt Ida does while 'Sweatin' to the Oldies' on a hot day. Better go buy some soap." He then heads to the corner store to get some soap. While he is hunting for the kind that does not make him smell like wild berries, he walks past several kinds that do. On a wild whim, he grabs one of these for his girlfriend. She enjoys smelling like wild berries. He pays for the soaps and then goes home, because he is done. He will not wander and peruse any further, since there is no need to. He will find himself extremely proud for two reasons: He actually bought her something, and her birthday is coming up anyway. He can honestly say he remembered!
Women can focus on one thing for hours. If an item is on sale, regardless of what it is, then a woman must study it and compare prices and features. Then she will be able to make an informed consumer decision, such as which overpriced eyeliner is the smarter buy.
What makes this habit unbearable for men is that we get dragged along for the ride. Women, if your man says the first outfit you try on is the perfect one, don't assume he's lying. He's probably telling the you the truth, since he thinks you look great in anything. However, he is getting an added benefit - you might take him at his word and actually buy it...and then go home. It may not have happened this easy in the history of your marriage, but he still believes it could happen today...
...until you frown at him and try on the next thirty-two outfits.
Oh, well. It was worth a try!