Interview With the Honest Toddler

Today I have the honor of sharing with you a rare interview with the Honest Toddler. If you're not familiar with the Honest Toddler, then I forgive you for not following my advice, but only if you immediately go fix your errant ways.

Here. We. Go!

My son Evan doesn't like juice (even the red kind). Should I take him to the doctor?
First try Hawaiian Punch. It's basically melted Jolly Ranchers.

Sometimes my son will beg for something - and then throw it on the ground when I give it to him. What am I doing wrong?
You made him wait too long. Cut your response time in half and you'll begin to see positive results. 

Why is Evan afraid of our neighbor's 6" tall mutt, but not other things, like traffic?
Most toddlers are terrified of small dogs; they resemble frantic, hairy, coordinated infants. Traffic on the other hand is like a real-time video game. 

What do you want to be when you grow up?

What's your favorite bedtime stall tactic?
Repeat hugs/kiss requests. Who can say no. LOL

What's your favorite book?
The longest one on hand. 

Evan turns two in August. What should we get him for his birthday?
A Ziplock bag of powdered sugar and a dirt bike.

What else should we get Evan for his birthday?