Ricky's Olympics

The Olympics are coming. I get excited when it's time to watch the Olympics. The competition, the talent, the sportsmanship if we remember to get around to it.

After seeing some of the sports that will be featured, I got to wondering what I'd be good at.

Swimming? Nope. Gymnastics? Ha. Running? Not likely, unless there's bears involved.

So I decided I'd have to create my own events.

  • Hastily Hitting the Honey-Do List Right Before My Wife Gets Home From Work
    • Can't let her know I've been blogging all day!
  • Wait Lifting
    • I've been waiting to lift heavy weights for years. I intend for that streak to become a world record.
  • Modern Puntathlon
    • I can walk around and tell bad jokes ALL DAY LONG.
  • Driving
    • Similar to its water-based counterpart, diving, except you stay in your car and order Chik-Fil-A.
  • Requestrian
    • From the couch you must ask for, and receive, two cold drinks and three snacks within a 60 minute window. If you get slapped, you lose.

How would you do in my Olympics?