How To Be a Sports Star

I think most kids grow up to work dead-end jobs simply because they didn't know how to get to their dream ones.

So this one's for the kids. Every kid has dreamed at one point in their lives of being a sports star.

Impressive skills, crazy salaries, millions of people praying you'll make a mistake and lose the big game. What's not to like?

Things You Can Do Now To Prepare For Your Future As A Sports Star
  • Stretch. You don't want to pull a hamstring this early in the game. You've got a long way to go, so you'd better warm up nice and easy.
  • Pick a sport. You should watch all kinds of sports on TV and go in person to any game you can. You have to figure out which sports you like (baseball), and which ones make you contemplate faking a heart attack just to get away (soccer).
  • Learn from the best. This will involve stalking your favorite stars. The younger you start, the easier it is to get away with this.
  • Practice signing your autograph. This is very important. Remember that one day, a youngster like yourself will get your autograph as a Christmas present from his rich absentee father in a desperate bid to buy his son's love. Don't spoil it.
  • Take a drama class. Whether it's arguing with an official or faking an injury to get a call against the other team, sports stars need some extra drama in their lives.
What tips do you have for the kids?