Doctors

This is how I'm convinced every doctor's appointment is going to go:

Me: Doc, what do you think could be causing this weird symptom?

Doc: Something expensive.

Me: Would you care to elaborate?

Doc: Something very expensive.

Me: Such as?

Doc: We'll have to run some tests.

*3 weeks, 2 blood draws and a series of x-rays later*

Doc: I'm going to have to refer you to my golfing buddy. I mean, a specialist.

Me: Oh, dear. What did you find?

Doc: Inconclusive. But we did confirm the presence of an epicondyle.

Me: Can you remove it?

Doc: Your elbow? Not necessary. But please pay my receptionist four million dollars on the way out. 

Me: Absolutely. Thank you!